The Best (And Weirdest) MLB Promos of All Time (According to the MLB)

By Brendan Menapace

It got started a bit late, but the MLB season is finally upon us. It looks a little different, though, and we don’t mean the DH in the National League. The empty stadiums are things we’re going to have to get used to, and we’re certainly going to miss giveaway nights at Phillies games here in Philadelphia.

There’s no doubt other fans and the teams themselves are missing the chance to get creative with promo items. They’ve just had to get creative in other ways, like sending items directly to season ticketholders and handing out items for fans outside of the stadiums.

In the meantime, we can still remember promotional items of past seasons. Thankfully, MLB.com did some of the real legwork (you could say they’re the real MVPs) and ranked what they believed were the weirdest promotions from each franchise.

We at Promo Marketing equate “weirdest” with “best” in baseball, which is why we love the Phillie Phanatic and Minor League Baseball team names so much. So, let’s take a look at what we think are the best of what MLB.com ranked as the weirdest.

1. Minnesota Twins Joe Mauer Sideburns

Remember when the Twins did a "Joe Mauer sideburns" promotion ? The GOAT giveaway pic.twitter.com/CKTwEp3MC1

— Ross Wendlandt (@RossWetLand) March 8, 2018

OK, yeah, these are weird. There’s absolutely no denying that. It reminds us of on “Spongebob” when he and Patrick try to act grown up by sticking fake sideburns to their face. Because that’s exactly what this is.

That said, we would absolutely rock these in the stands and try to get on TV every chance we get.

2. Detroit Tigers Zubaz

https://www.instagram.com/p/oKjO_YMZLr/?utm_source=ig_embed

Remember Zubaz? The ultra-patterned athletic/casual wear that we all thought was dead? Well, guess what. Some things don’t stay dead. And the Tigers went all (patterned) out for these bad boys.

https://www.instagram.com/justinverlander/?utm_source=ig_embed

3. Seattle Mariners Edgar Martinez Bat Lamp

Not only is Edgar Martinez one of the greatest DH’s in baseball history, this giveaway is a triumph. I would proudly display this in my front window, exclaiming to all of my neighbors that it was a major award.

(Ask any Mariners fan, and they’d probably tell you that you deserve an award just for going to games lately.)

4. Washington Nationals’ Bryce Harper Chia Pet

July 5th @Nationals Bryce Harper Chia head #NatsClubhouseSocial pic.twitter.com/MtTsXyvfxe

— NatsBobbles (@NatsBobbles) March 17, 2016

Back before Bryce Harper joined the good guys in Philly, his facial hair prowess was recognized down there in D.C. We’re not sure anyone has actually bought a Chia Pet in decades. They’re fun as a freebie, though. Now that Harper’s luxurious locks are up in Philly, this Chia Pet has probably gotten buried in some sour Nats fans’ gardens in the D.C. area.

5. Cincinnati Reds Bronson Arroyo Hair Hat

Bronson Arroyo hat with hair. pic.twitter.com/WKCpTbNCq4

— Daniel King (@KingandSwiss) March 2, 2019

We're sensing a theme here. Look, maybe you aren’t gifted with the hair genes like Harper or Reds pitcher Bronson Arroyo. That’s OK! That’s where this hair comes into play. Sure, it looks a bit like a Kenny Powers Halloween costume, but we’re sure no one would even know it’s a fake.

We wish we could report on more of these giveaways as the season goes on. And maybe we’ll get to! Like we said before, franchises have been working hard to make things as normal as possible, even if you can’t get into the stadium and get mustard all over your giveaway T-shirt. We’re certain we’ll have some exciting promotional items to report on from outside of the parks.